136 Seafood Puns That Might Leave You In Stitches (2024)

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Fishes usually sleep on water beds.

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When your fish boss is watching, you’d better look e-fish-ent.

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Young shrimp is not popular in Japanese cuisine because of short tempura.

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We should dolphinitely go easy on the fish puns.

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Speaking of being jelly, tunas were really miffed about the whole salmon-ella thing.

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How’s the calamari? Why, it’s ex-squid-sit, thank you.

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What did fish use Tinder?

To find a gill-friend.

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Crabs frantically search for a place to hide so that they can eat alone. I think that's shellfish.

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The best job for a crab is being a crab driver.

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During Christmas, Santa Claws brings presents to young crabs.

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When a crab eats too much it feels clawful!

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The kind of helmets that hermit crabs wear are shell-mets.

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The crustacean was really unhappy because his wife was being crabby.

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A fish's favorite TV Show is 'Whale of Fortune'.

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A fish's favorite activity is to surf the net.

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Some people don't really like puns about fish, but they are kraken me up!

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There is one piece of advice I swear by. Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.

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I don't think I should buy from the seafood market here. There isn't salmon I can trust.

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Ribs become seafood when you go to a so-fish-ticated restaurant.

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Whenever I see food, I eat it because I am on a seafood diet.

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I cannot eat shellfish that have been steamed in water. I have shellfish steamed issues.

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The young shrimp left his job because it was a tempurary role.

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Crabs usually call their friends on a shell phone.

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You can tuna fish by adjusting their scales.

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You should not be making a-trout-cious fish puns. They are of-fin-sive.

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My dad quit being a fisherman because his net income was very low.

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When jellyfish act catty, it’s only because they’re jelly.

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You can’t expect a squid to answer a tough question without inking about it first.

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Why do most people dislike anchovies?

Because they’re a little fishy.

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What did the dentist say to the super-anxious shark?

Jaws relax.

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It was a great oppor-tuna-ty to try new fish!

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I love seafood so much. I think it's fintastic.

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The shrimp could easily afford to buy a new house because he prawned everything.

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Crabs get around on land by using the sidewalk.

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The crab and lobster never share their food because they are shellfish!

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A crab answers the phone by saying "Shello?"

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The crab refused to speak a single word after it went through acute trauma. It was completely shell shocked.

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When the baby shark did not have his way with things, he whaled.

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A fish with a brain condition should always visit a brain sturgeon.

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When a fish is confused, it says, "can you please be a little more pacific?"

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When two fish were arguing, one said, "I don't sea it that way!"

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Fishes don't like basketball because they are scared of the net!

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What’s the only right answer when a salmon asks you for a light?

I didn’t know you smoked, salmon.

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I never should have gone to the fishy store. I got prawned.

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If anybody steals fish from the store the boss will make them walk the plankton.

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When the fish's grades came, his teacher said "Not bad, but you cod do better."

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Fish puns are all I have been herring about.

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When you mix a fish and a banker, you get a loan-shark.

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To make an octopus laugh, you need to give it ten-tickles.

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I have not thought of a fish pun yet. Seems like I need some time to mullet over?

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I am running out of fish puns. I cannot find any betta ones.

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We have no time to address fishcious rumors. We have better fish to fry.

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DJ's are banned from working in fish markets because they always drop the bass.

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We whaley need to stop now! We've had too much pun.

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If you can come up with better fish puns, do let minnow.

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A fish's favorite TV Show is 'Tuna Half Men.'

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What did you think of the series fin-ale?

Well, it wasn’t the bass-ed.

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What’s the one fish that 40 percent of all Americans are afraid of?

Clownfish.

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How do fish encourage their college kids?

Any fin is possible, just don’t trout yourself!

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I went to the ocean disco last night but I hurt myself. I must have pulled a mussel.

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I heard about the fight that broke out in the seafood restaurant. There was battered fish everywhere.

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I never should have eaten seafood at that fishy place. I feel eel.

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When I went to eat at the seafood eatery, I thought I saw my old friend. But it was salmon else.

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When the baby tuna fish was asked his age, he replied, "I am tuna half."

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A favorite party game of fishes is 'Salmon says.'

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I hated the clownfish that they served in the restaurant. It tasted funny.

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The fish chef did not listen to any criticism because he was hard of herring.

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The Rock's favorite seafood is a rock lobster.

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I made a lot of fish eye soup. It will sea me through the week.

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Seafood is really healthy because it is good for the mussels.

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A shrimp usually goes to borrow money from a prawn broker.

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A necessity while cooking prawns in the kitchen is a-ron.

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An indecisive prawn is so tempuramental.

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A crab that throws things is called a lobster.

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When a crab gets a smartphone they take lots of shellfies.

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A crab's favorite fruit is Crab Apples!

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When you cross a shellfish and an apple, it becomes a crab.

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A meditating crab in self-isolation is called a hermit crab.

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A crab who is afraid of small spaces is claw-strophobic.

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When the aquarium fish wanted more space, he told the others, "I want to discus something with you all."

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A dolphin's favorite type of flour is all-porpoise flour.

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The fishes crossed the sea to get to the other tide.

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What did one fish say to the other when they met after a while?

"Long time no sea!"

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Fishes need a lot of vitamin sea to stay healthy.

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Any fin is possible if you trout your gut!

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The fish couple made their wedding news o-fish-al.

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The fisherman who couldn't read was lost at C.

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A lone fish after a disaster is called the sole survivor.

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The Lochness monster's favorite thing to eat is fish-n-ships.

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A fisherman can never be a good boxer. All he throws are hooks.

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Fishes who live at the bottom of the ocean are the ones who dropped out of school.

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The bigmouth bass who got caught by a fisherman is now in a boatload of trouble.

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The most expensive fish in the market is goldfish.

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Just like the tunafish sandwich said, I’ve got a feeling we’re not in cans-us anymore.

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Hey, would you mind letting minnow what you think about this one?

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The thing about calamari is you can never tell when it’s just squidding.

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When a fish meets the love of their life, they say they’ve “met the gill of my dreams.”

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Crayfish were offended by the publication of Eat Cray Love because they felt the lack of punctuation might send the wrong message.

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Isn’t it a bit misleading to call thinly sliced raw beef carp-accio?

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The thing salmons don’t like about tunas is everything’s a big sea-cret.

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How do shellfish take photos?

With a clam-era.

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What was the Russia Tsar’s favorite type of fish?

Tsardines!

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I went to the seafood mart but the employees seemed fishy.

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A blind person was eating see-food but it did not help.

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The most blessed seafood is holy mackerel.

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There are countless good plaices to eat seafood at.

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I hate people who crack seafood site jokes. Seems like they are fishing for laughs.

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A shrimp that keeps getting hurt is accident prawn.

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Crabs love to shellabrate on their birthday.

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The crab buffet came with so many restrictions. I should have read the claws before paying for it.

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Fishes usually go to learn at the school of fish.

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The fish student got bad grades in his school because it was below C level!

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One way to make a fish laugh to tell a whale of a tale.

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When fishes leave they usually wave goodbye.

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The fishes hated going to the beach because it was so un-tidey.

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Oh my cod, I laugh so hard when someone cracks a seafood joke.

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The fish puns were so funny, they were krilling me with laughter!

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The fish that go to heaven are angelfish.

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A celebrity fish is called a star-fish.

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I am hoping to avoid turtle disaster.

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I'm hooked with making fish puns now, but I am still not quite up to scale.

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When the two fish became friends, it seemed that they were swimming along nicely.

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All I can sea are bass-ically the cod awful fish puns!

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To communicate with a fish you haven't met in ages, you should drop a line.

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When a fish is hyperventilating due to anxiety, clam it down.

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Never fall in love with a blowfish. You’ll always get re-puffed.

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When another fish tries to make you think you’re cray-zy, tell them to stop bass-lighting.

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Never try to talk to a fish before they’ve caf-fin-ated.

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Why isn’t the bachelor fish married?

Because he has fin-timacy issues.

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Most fish will tell you that they like their food cold…

And their bait a little worm.

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A seafood delivery truck should actually be called a school bus.

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When crabs go to coffee shops, they usually order a cup of crab-uccino!

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Crabs usually leave the hospital on crotches after treatment!

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Crabs only prefer just a pinch of salt in their food.

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If you’re going for roe-mance, then you’ll want to consider the caviar.

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Lobsters would get along a lot better with the other shellfish if they weren’t always trying to lobster things up.

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